In his story, Hit, Daniel Olivas does a great job of creating a character filled with emotions - grief, frustration, anger, worry - all within four short pages. Adan, having lost his left foot in Iraq, has been sent back home where he's living with his father. His mother, slowly losing her mind, is living in an assisted living residence. Adan is undergoing physical therapy to learn how to walk with his prosthetic foot.
Within the first conversation between he and his father, Adan's anger and frustration both appear, and in neither case does Olivas force the issue. The story is a great example of how to quickly develop a well rounded character. Olivas mainly uses dialogue, going the show don't tell route so often plugged by those who teach creative writing.
One thing that often slows down such a story, heavy on dialogue, is when an author doesn't distinquish between the various voices well enough, creating a difficulty for the reader to determine who is speaking. Olivas avoids this problem, as the two main conversations occur between Adan and his father, and then between Adan and Jasmine, an employee at a massage parlor. In each case, there are very different voices speaking, easily allowing the reader to distinguish the characters. It is this excellent usage of dialogue that helps propel this story to its powerful conclusion.
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